Mind Set Is Everything
Walking out to another day with in the crisp, cold wind in your face can be invigorating.
It can also be freezing cold, and miserable. Depends on how you look at it.
Around here, mind set is everything. Every. Thing.
From the minute I wake up to the last thoughts before fading off to sleep at night, and all that happens in between, I remind myself that in spite of current circumstances, I am blessed.
I wish I could get others around me to practice the same philosophy, but this place will remind you that none of us can make anyone else drink the kool-aid you feel is better for them. So I go about my days in my own world.
Yesterday, after Derrell left, I finished painting the mural on the wall for GROW. It's a photo used from day 15 of my blog, with the tiny ant pushing a boulder up a steep hill. Looked more like a mountain by the time we finished, but it was pretty satisfying to finish the wall. Afterwards, I went to the Education building to get some work done. I have three projects to complete before my professor comes from ASU on Wednesday, and I hadn't started yet. It feels like I just turned in the last assignment. So, I ended up hunkering down for 4 hours and getting it all done. When I left, it was dark and time to go inside. I totally lost track of time, engrossed in my work.
Upon arriving to the building, there were wet floor cones just inside the door, and one worker cleaning with a sign up saying CLOSED FROM 4 TO 6 PM FOR CLEANING. It was 4:30pm, so I said something to the cleaning orderly along the lines of wanting to just sit in a classroom and work. Since I work in the building also, it's usually not an issue. She snapped back with a snarky "Closed." This is a person I may have mentioned. She tries to be hard, and you can tell she made up her mind coming here that she'd need to put up a front, so she's pretty much always shitty. She's dubbed "Fester" because she shaved her tattooed head to match her attempted gansta look, but ended up looking more like Uncle Fester from the Adam's Family. She has some pretty obvious mental issues, so I remain compassionate, but not outwardly. Just keep my distance, as with everyone else, but extra with her.
Not wanting to get in to it with her, I turned around to walk out (Ana would be proud). As I did, about eight girls ran up to the door. I told the one leading the pack, "Closed until 6 o'clock," She replied "I don't fu#@ing care!" proceeded to shoulder me as she barged in with her posse behind her. I knew they were there for Fester. I could've kept walking and minded my own business. I know I could have. But sometimes, not getting an officer is minding the business. I turned back around and went back inside. Fester was alone- cleaning the clerk's office. It was only her in a building with no staff, no cameras, and she was about to get jumped by some pretty serious people. Whatever came over me, I had my big girl voice on and yelled at all of them. "Get out! Now!" I walked back to the clerk's office and saw they had Fester pinned to the wall. "I said Get Out! She's doing her job. We work here. I told you we're closed!" The leader shot back that she called her a snitch, but she's the real snitch and snitch this blah blah snitch that... I told her to deal with it later, but not here. Surprisingly, they listened. They all backed off and left. I walked to the door to make sure they kept going, then back to the the office Fester was cleaning. She looked at me with a frightened look of relief. This person who has been nasty to me and overall vile, and I just saved her butt from being jumped in an empty building at night in prison. "You good?" I asked her. She nodded in the affirmative, and I said "OK. I'm taking classroom 4 and doing my homework." Another nod.
No other words needed.
Sometimes, people are not able to respond to words of encouragement, or be led by examples of a positive mindset.
Sometimes, people just need to suffer experience after experience to come around. I know I did. Only then, could I advance to correcting my mindset to be the best person I can be for myself and those I love.